I left your package in the side yard!

I’d like you all to conduct a little thought experiment with me regarding a story that is getting some play in the media this weekend. Please follow the link for tawdry details and then return. While I can certainly sympathize with the mail carrier to a  certain extent, perhaps he suffers from irritable bowel syndrome or had contracted a case of the stomach flu, or merely consumed an especially greasy burrito from the unlicensed mobile taqueria down the street, it does seem that a more genteel solution could have been found for what must have been an “emergency” situation.

Dispense for a moment with judgements of right and wrong if you will. When forced against his will to choose between the bad and worse decision of dropping a cube in the assumed semi-privacy of a side yard or in his shorts, due consideration must be given when weighing such an emergency against the mail carriers code of “Neither rain, nor sleet, nor dead of night” etc. and whether he was nearer to or further from the end of an eight hour shift traveled by foot. Let no man past a certain age who has eaten spicy foods while simultaneously consuming many beers throw the first stone.

Benefit of the doubt so granted, still you must ask yourself. If an employee in the private sector had for any reason whatsoever elected to defecate on any sort of personal property of a customer that was not specifically a toilet, and was caught on tape in the act, and the act was widely publicized due to a slow news Friday or whatever, would said employee have any reasonable expectation of his employer welcoming him with open arms the following Monday? If I may be so bold, I think that the answer to that question is fairly self-evident.

In review. Not only do government employees make more money, work fewer hours, and possess superior benefits than their peers in the private sector, they now have municipally approved, union protected carte blanche to shit on the taxpayer not just figuratively but literally as well. Think about that the next time you’re queuing up at the post office.

H/T to Gerard, who keeps me up to date on the really important stuff.


One response to “I left your package in the side yard!

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